I am lucky enough to have a pretty candid relationship with one of John’s brothers. He and John are close, and they have similar ways of thinking, so it’s a very comfortable dynamic between us. For the purpose of this series, I will introduce him in all of his glory: his name is Glen and he is, by all accounts and definition, a brainiac. He is effortlessly intelligent, to the point of being a Mensa member. Glen attended Ohio State University where he was allowed a triple major, and received his M.B.A. from Columbia University. He enjoyed a successful career in finance on Wall Street. (I’ve also been on Wall Street, but that was because my sister sent me to see if the bronze bull is really there. It is.) So I’m introducing Glen because he factors in my story; while he is intimidatingly smart and accomplished (and retired at age 46), he is also affable, warm, very funny, and completely down to earth. He has a beautiful wife that I adore. They belong in a snowglobe. Anyway, I am mentioning all of this because it was Glen who introduced me to the philosophy of the Red Pill, and when I first heard about it, I wondered how on earth someone like him could possibly get sucked into the biggest load of horseshit ridiculousness I had ever heard. And I’m not kidding. I was floored. And I was mad! And then … I thought about it. Here we go.

One day, I was in the kitchen chatting with Glen, and I mentioned a little benign squabble John and I had. I laughed as I told him that I found myself completely captivated and turned on when John squares off with me and argues back. I said, “You know, John is very even-tempered, but wow … when he raises his voice with me and puts me in my place, HOLY COW! I should be mad, but it actually makes me so attracted to him!” Glen raised his eyebrows, nodded, smiled and said, “…A.W.A.L.T.” “What?” I said. Glen was leaning against a doorframe on his shoulder, ankles crossed, spinning his wedding band on his finger. He tilted his head and looked right at me. He crossed his arms and he said it again. “A.W.A.L.T. … All … Women … Are … Like … That.” “What?” Now I crossed MY arms. “No, we’re not. I’m not. I’m nothing like any other woman.” “You’re like EVERY other woman,” Glen responded. “Nope.” “Yep.” John strolled into the room and gave me a solid smack on my behind as he walked past and bent down to kiss my cheek. (He’s 6’3) He reached in a cabinet, got a glass, and opened the refrigerator. “What are you guys talking about?” He asked. Glen said, “A.W.A.L.T.” ” Ooohhh, yeah. Oh, yes.” John chuckled. “John, you know that I’m not like other women. You’ve said so!” “No, I said you have different ideas and viewpoints than most women, and you’re better than most women – which is why I’m with you,” (whaddya mean most women?) ” … but yes, A.W.A.L.T. It applies to you, my dear.” Glen said, “Women are the gate keepers of sex, and men are the gatekeepers of relationships.” “What does THAT mean?” I said. “This is ridiculous.” Ok, Archie Bunker. Hello, 1974. Come on. Glen said, “Listen. These aren’t my ideas, this is just the way it is.” I looked over at John, who tilted his head and shrugged. “Yeah.” ” … so …you mean we are all hard wired to behave one way in a relationship with the opposite sex? … that’s it? As in, we can’t help it?” In unison, on opposite sides of the room, with me standing in the middle, John and Glen both answered. “Yes.” “Oh for God’s sake,” I said.

Silence.

I looked at Glen, who was still casually leaning against the door frame, spinning his wedding band on his finger, nodding at me. “Yep.” I looked over at John, who was leaning against the countertop, ankles crossed. He took a drink and nodded. “Mmm-hmmm.” I said, “Wait … like … like a caveman sort of thing? Like a caveman who clunks his woman over the head and drags her into his cave? Like that?” “Well,” Glen said. “Not exactly … ” John finished. “Look,” Glen continued. “Why did you get all turned on when John raised his voice at you?” John threw his head back and laughed. I said, “I don’t know,” “Yes, you do,” Glen challenged. ” … well …” I chewed my lip. ” Because …” Glen said. “Because … ” I raised my eyebrows and shook my head at him. I really didn’t know. “Because he was being the man. You like that. You’re supposed to like that!” “I-” “John raised his voice and you in turn wanted to give him sex. Didn’t you?” “Whu- I …” “It’s okay – Didn’t you?” “Yes,” I admitted. Wow. Uh … Hmmm. “Right. Because – again – Men are the gatekeepers of relationships and women are the gatekeepers of sex.” I stood there with my mouth open and my eyebrows up. What? “Shannon. John was being an Alpha. He was in control of it and of you. If he had wrung his hands and whimpered and said, ‘Yes dear,’ you would’ve thought he was a pussy and moved on.” “No way.” I countered. Glen crossed his arms again and said, “Absolutely.” I looked over at John who mouthed the words oh yeah. I looked back at Glen. “Women. Do. Not. Like. Betas. … Period.” I opened my mouth, very obviously trying to form some sort of argument, because, this was certainly an arguable point. … wasn’t it? But, I could say nothing. Now wait just a damn minute! … Really?? “Shannon, what do you like about John?” Glen strolled over to the Keurig and turned it on, keeping his back to me, but obviously listening. At least this was something I could answer. What don’t I like about John? I said, “He’s tall, strong, smart. He’s capable. He’s independent. I like that he’s a contractor, I love that he builds things; he creates and he figures things out. He can do anything, really. I feel completely safe with him. He … he dominates naturally. He isn’t afraid of anybody or anything.” Glen turned around to face me and nodded his head. “And what does all of that mean? What IS all of that?” I thought about it for a second. “Power.” I answered. “Power.” Glen echoed. Get the Hell outta here. I was dumbfounded at this revelation. “And,” Glen continued, “If, during that fight, John had cried and pleaded with you not to leave him … ” “Yuck.” I grimaced. “Right, Shannon. Right. John is an Alpha, and you like that. You are hard wired to like that. Once again – A.W.A.L.T. Women do not like Betas. You are a woman. John is an Alpha.” I nodded my head but my thoughts were tumbling one over the other. None of this had ever really occurred to me with this gravity.

And then the bomb dropped and a shower of Red Pills rained down.

John said, “And this predisposition and evolutionary hard wiring his why men must have multiple partners. It’s why men cannot have only one partner, why monogamy is unnatural, why women consider it cheating, but men consider it nature.” I whipped my head around, completely startled. “WHAT?” I looked at Glen, who shrugged. “Yeah. It’s a fact.” WHAT? “Monogamy is NOT unnatural, John! What are you TALKING about?” Uh oh. This enlightened forest suddenly got real dark. “Shannon, one partner for a man’s entire life, one sexual partner is not natural. We are predisposed to ‘spread our seed’ so to speak, and that is why so many women appeal to us. It’s why we are attracted to women all throughout the day,” (you what??) “And it’s why men have twenty partners – or whatever, to a woman’s 5 partners. Men are designed to roam, women are designed to find one man and keep him.” I sharply inhaled and placed my hands on my chest. This was not what I wanted to hear. And yet, John kept going. “See, you know how men can sleep with a woman and leave the next morning and not even ask her name?” ” … not from personal experience, but yes…” “And you know how women really can’t handle that? Women get all clingy? That’s why. Men are supposed to be attracted to and sleep with lots of women. It’s how we’re wired. This is why men bang a ton of girls and he’s a stud, and a girl bangs a bunch of guys and she’s a whore,” I shook my head emphatically. “That’s a double standard!” ” … Well, that’s life. And if you had told me you had been with lots of men before me, you wouldn’t have gotten a second date.” “But you have had LOT’S of women!” I argued. “That’s not fair!” ” …but I’m a man, Shannon.” I whipped my head around to look at Glen. He nodded. He said, “…Red Pill. It’s hard to swallow.” “What is the Red Pill??” I asked. I wanted to throw up. This is NOT what I want to hear. What?? Glen said, “The red Pill is accepting mating strategies from a purely evolutionary perspective.”

I swear to God, if you had been there, you would have actually heard the tires screeching in my head. Everything came to a screaming halt.

The Red Pill is accepting mating strategies from a purely evolutionary perspective. Evolutionary. Evolutionary. “Mating Strategies”?? What about LOVE? Monogamy is “unnatural”? Who even THINKS this way?

WHAT?

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Red Pill.

To be continued…